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Where do I
want to be?
Communication
Understanding addiction
Overwhelming emotion
My values
and strengths
What can I do to be happier? It’s a question frequently asked by people who have been living in a stressful environment, surrounded by chaos, for so long, they’ve run out of ideas about how to make decisions or lifestyle changes that they know will ultimately lead to a more satisfying life.
Often when we’re feeling angry we say and do things we later regret. When we’re embarrassed or ashamed, we isolate ourselves from family and friends. And when we’re scared or intimidated, we let people talk us into doing something we’re not comfortable with. Emotions largely control our decision making and while it’s perfectly normal to “follow our heart” or “go with our gut”, sometimes the decisions we make when we’re highly emotional aren’t helpful for us or the people we love.
Addiction is a physical or psychological need to do, use or take something to the point where it becomes harmful to our health, relationships and finances. Although there’s much debate about the causes of addictive behaviour, one thing is for certain, addiction is an incredibly complex issue.
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Research shows that motivation builds when we feel hopeful about our future. On the other hand, when we feel hopeless, any effort to change our lives seems pointless, as the risk of trying and failing could lead to even greater disappointment. Rather than making ourselves feel bad about where we’re at, it can help to think about what we want our future to look like and map out the steps needed to get there.
What makes relationships work? Is it good communication? Shared interests? Respect, trust and honesty? No doubt all of these things are important, but something else often gets overlooked. It’s how we resolve the inevitable conflicts that arise in our relationships.